I have been in a state of complete mental overload for more than a week. I have non-working memory.
It became obvious when I broke down into tears in class last week in frustration because conjugating verbs was too much for me. I had gotten more and more confused as more information came at me. I was no longer able to absorb or process it.
I am like a computer with a memory leak that needs a reboot. My refrain in class today was “Wait, wait, I need time to process that!”
Your working memory has limited capacity and can only do so much. This is called the cognitive load. If you load your working memory with too much information, then there’s no room to process it, which makes it more difficult to recall the information later on.
I cringe every time someone asks the question “Have you watched the video?” Watched isn’t the same as understanding. It has been a snowball effect that each week it got harder to comprehend the videos because I had unresolved questions from previous videos. This week of truly intense review of all the material from all the classes and trying to figure out what I don’t understand has been exhausting. My brain hurts. I haven’t slept.
I think I might just be on the edge of figuring out how the heck verb conjugation works, but I need to write the patterns down and get LOTS of practice using them, so that it moves to long term memory and becomes an automatic skill.
Seriously, an hour speaking practice on a subject I am not completely comfortable with is too much of a mental strain. I’ve had such terrible headaches trying to figure out verb conjugation.
Teacher gives a verb, and we are to conjugate it into honorific/formal polite statement ㅂ니다, honorific question (both 까 세요), common/polite 요, casual/banmal, past tense, and future tense. This requires figuring out the changed and unchanged form of the verb, if there are consonants or vowels, if this is an exception case, and remembering all the patterns to form the different tenses.
Some day I will be better at this, I hope. Now, it is a very slow process.